You know, every now and then the whole try-to-get-published thing can be a downer. Today, for example, I’ve been put in a bit of a bad mood because I read on another person’s blog that they’ve heard back already from an editor I’m waiting to hear back from. How silly is that? Why in the world should my current mood be affected by hearing about other people’s success? The thing is, I know that even if I did get published, I’d still have other things to worry about. Will my book sell in stores? Will I be able to make a career out of the business? How are foreign rights doing? I know several successful authors personally, and I know from seeing them that it’s not like getting published automatically makes your days sunny and bright. I know that in the end, my current whiny mood is just the desire to have someone in “the know” read my books and tell me that they’re publishable. And I know that even once I got that acknowledgment, I’d only want more. I’d only want more and more people to buy those books and agree that they’re good. Having other people reaffirm your self-worth is like a drug, and it’s something I think I need to avoid like the plague.
Too bad I’m not better at doing that.
Now I want to know who heard back from the editor, and which editor it was. Link me?
I feel that way too, sometimes. I tell myself that when other people succeed, I need to be happy for them, because I want other people to be happy for me when I make it. And then I tell myself that I will make it, and it’s only a matter of time. I try to fill that void that needs reassurance with my own opinion of my writing.
This doesn’t actually work, but sometimes it takes the edge off. Lately I’ve been feeling very confident–perhaps over-confident.
For what it’s worth, I don’t think you should give it up.
Private email sent.