I am not a pineapple expert by any means. I know what they look like. I know what they taste like. I wouldn’t be able to pick a ripe pineapple if my life depended on it. Until. I took a tour of the Maui Gold Pineapple Plantation. It took around an hour and a half, and we took a little bus all over that place. This might sound like something that was pretty boring. It was not. In fact, it’s a testament to the fact that if you know your subject really well, then practically anything can be super interesting. …

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Continuing on the report of my trip to Maui, let’s talk about Mount Haleakala. Remember the big volcano I talked about yesterday? That’s Mount Haleakala. It’s also a National Park (so it costs $30 to visit). Now, when I hear “volcano,” I picture lava shooting into the air, with the occasional earthquake for good measure. This one doesn’t have that. In fact, it doesn’t even have a crater. If Frodo was supposed to chuck the ring into Mount Haleakala, he’d have just wandered around for a few days looking for a place to chuck it. (Are you taking notes, Sauron? …

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I’d heard about the road to Hana plenty of times before I actually drove it. “It’s magical.” “It’s the best part of Maui.” “You’ll love it.” It was odd, since it’s rare to hear so much about a road to a place and so little about the place itself. Now that I’ve actually done the complete loop around the island, I’ve got a better idea about what they’re talking about. First off, what is it. Maui basically consists of two mountains: a big one (with a volcano at the top) and a smaller one (that I assume also had a …

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