How to Solve the Budget Crisis within the Next Few Years

Rain Man (Special Edition)How to solve the unbalanced budget in the next few years:

Step One: Get all the current Republican congressmen to sign a contract saying they will always support a Bryce’s Balanced Budget Plan (BBBP). Make this contract 100% binding. Make all the new ones that come in sign the same thing until step two starts.

Step Two: Wait for control of the White House to switch to Republicans. Suddenly, Democrats will be back to clamoring how awful it is that we’re spending so much money.

Step Three: Just get the Republicans to follow through on their contract. The Democrats will now want BBBP, the Republicans will be forced to do it, and it’ll get done.

What is BBBP?

  1. You sit all members of Congress down in a big room together.
  2. You break them up into groups of 5.
  3. You pass out enough copies of the game Pay Day so that each group gets a copy.
  4. The winner of each group goes on to the next round, where they go up against the other winners.
  5. Repeat this until you’re down to 6 Republicans and 6 Democrats.
  6. Put them in a room together in the middle of summer.
  7. Lock the room.
  8. Turn off the A/C.
  9. Give them a pencil and all the paper they want.
  10. Don’t let them out until they’ve got a budget that spends less than the US takes in.
  11. This budget is binding.
  12. Do this every year.

See? Problem solved.

I’m sick of whichever party isn’t in office sitting around complaining about how terrible and awful it is that the party in power spends so much money, then as soon as they gain power, they start finding all these important things that need to be funded.

Stop providing aid to other countries.
Slash Medicaid.
Decimate Social Security.
Forget about going to space for a few decades.
Increase taxes for everybody.
No more bailouts.

Do what has to be done so that we don’t spend more than we bring in each year.

Stop behaving like spoiled children on the playground.

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