Little Debbie Strikes Back

Now, don’t have to blame this all on Little Debbie. It’s certainly in the realm of possibility that it’s a coincidence my stomach is still roiling and severely unhappy a day after eating her offerings. I work in a public place. I also ate free sugar cookies yesterday (and too much pasta salad). It could have been the eggnog I downed when I got home.

All I know is that I was fine yesterday, and then Little Debbie attacked me with her artificial offerings. It had to have been that brownie. Brownies aren’t supposed to be shaped like Christmas trees. They’re not supposed to be green. And they’re supposed to actually . . . you know: taste good. That brownie yesterday was the first thing I have literally spit out in a long time.

Bryces don’t spit out food. Especially not free food.

In any case, whatever I consumed yesterday made me less than happy today. I don’t have to blame this all on Little Debbie.

But I’m going to anyway.

CURSE YOU, LITTLE DEBBIE! This is me, shaking my fist to the sky, vowing never to eat your offerings again. At least not the cosmic brownies.


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